Wookiee-Nookie

Wookiee-Nookie Conflict: Date: Anytime Place: Anywhere Outcome: <insert name here> got raped. Combatants Madclaw! <insert name here> Commanders Wookiee Goldberg <insert name here> Strength Wookiee-Nookie Monster Madclaw! Animal Goldberg-Fett Wicket W. Warrick <insert name here> Casualties none <insert name here> <insert name here>'s marriage <insert name here>'s credit <insert name here>'s cornhole <insert name here>'s other various holes

[Source]

"OH NO, THE HORROR, THE HAIR, -UGH- THE TEETH, THE CLAWS,-AUCH- THE STENCH, OH NO, WHY ME?? WHY WAS I EVER BORN?? SHOOT ME FOR THE LOVE OF HUMANITY PLEASE SHOOT ME, SHOOT ME NOW!!!!!!!!"

―Average Wookiee-Nookie victim

Wookiee-Nookie, or: Kashyyyk-fornication in Basic is a combination between PWN and making love, it would happen when one aroused a Madclaw! Every single person, even Kyle Katarn (Wookiees are known Katarn hunters), would commit some sort of suicide before, during or after Wookiee-Nookie. For example, when faced with the prospect of mass Wookiee-Nookiee, Gonzo shot himself. Wookiee-Nookiee was a fate worse then Sand People torture and perhaps worse then having your planet destroyed, the latter is disputed however. Kshyy vines were sometimes used by Wookiees who were also extreme bondage fetishists.

Wookiee Nookie Survivors

The following is a list of confirmed and alleged non-Wookiee Wookiee-Nookie survivors:

• Yoda's alleged involvement in Wookie-Nookie is under much dispute, however evidence includes one of the little green giant's own quotes "Good relations with the Wookiees I have, mmmmm!"
• Cassus Fett was Wookiee-Nookied by Madclaw!, Wookiee Goldberg, that resulted in the birth of their son: Animal Goldberg-Fett.
• Wicket W. Warrick was feared for his Wookiee-Nookie skills, among his victims were: Leia Organa Solo and Cindel Towani.
• Wookiee-Nookie-ing was a favorite hobby of Darth Vader.

See also

• Relations
• Wookiee-Nookie Monster
• Wookiee sandwich