Roan Fel
Roan Fel, or That Perverted Old Man as he was sometimes called, was Emperor of the galaxy for about 5 minutes. It has been observed by many that he dresses like a pimp. He was very racist {generational thing}, and oooooooooooooweeeee was he ever old.
- "I am not old and I am not racist!"
- ―Roan Fel, to Wiki contributor
Yes, you are. He's like, what, 65?
- "I'm 53, GAHD DAMMIT!!!"
- ―Roan Fel, to Wiki contributor
It was his fault that Darth Fanon took over the galaxy.
- "LIES!!! ALL LIES!!!! Why must you LIE????"
- ―Roan Fel, to Wiki contributor
His hobbies include stalking me on Facebook.
- "Okay, that is true."
- ―Roan Fel
Antares Draco
Roan Fel's husband was Antares Draco, an Imperial Knight wannabe. After conquering a neighboring galaxy to bring under his crappy, crappy, empire, Roan Fel decided to relax at the beach planets of his new galaxy.
He was sunbathing under a palm tree with his best friend, Cade Skywalker, on the carcasses of their enemies. Fel saw Draco taking a bath nude in a tidal pool and thought he was hot.
Fel decided to take Draco home as his war bride.
"Greetings, young fellow. I am Roan Fel."
"I am Antares. Suuuuuuuuuuup?"
"Want to be my war bride, Antares?"
"Not really."
"That was a rhetorical question. I'm taking you as my war bride whether you like it or not."
"Awwww, man."
- Roan Fel picks up Antares
Roan Fel took Antares home and they married in an elaborate wedding planned by Darth Fanon. They were married by Reverend Cade Skywalker { wait, what?}.
"Hey, Sia! Meet your new stepmom!"
- Roan Fel to his daughterMarasiah
Darth Fanon and the Sith
- "You lousy kids GEHD OFF MAH LAWN!!!"
- ―Roan Fel, to Fanon's Sith
Fel and the Imperial Knights lived relatively peacefully with the Sith for a while. Fanon and Fel were best friends in elementary school. However, when Fanon tried to steal Fel's galaxy, he ended their friendship.
Well, it all happened like this: Roan Fel was having coffee with Darth Fanon to celebrate the ass-whooping that they gave the Yuuzhan Vong. Roan Fel left the room to use the can and when he came back he discovered Fanon had conquered his galaxy. Ouch.
