Mandalore (title)

"For Mandalore!!"

―Mandalorian battle cry

"For Me!!"

―Mandalore's personal battle cry

Mandalore was the title given to the capo di tuti capi (and the ruti tuti freshen fruti) of all the Mandalorian clans. A Mandalorian who PWND utterly would be chosen by his brethren to become Mandalore if the former Mandalore was PWND himself or had died of old age. This was named The rule of PWN. If a new Mandalore was chosen, the clans gave him a monniker that was closely related to his behaviour since most Mandalorians couldn't count. The new Mandalore also had the right to make a new symbol for his banner under which all the Mandalorian clans would unite. If they wouldn't, he killed them.

Known Mandalore's

Mandalore the First

This was the very first of all Mandalores, not much is known about him. Probably because he PWND a lot and destroyed a helluva lot of planets and left no witnesses. What is known is that he was a Taung from Coruscant. The Taung were the original Mandalorians but ceased to be so after a lengthy court case. Mandalore the First died winning a game of Mandalorian Roulette.

Mandalore the Bearded

"You bring the heads of defeated kings to my city steps, threaten my people with slavery, eat my pudding, drink my coffee, insult my queen and you don't like my beard... And why am I still talking to you when I should have Pwn3d you already?"

―Mandalore the Bearded to an enemy messenger

One of the first Human Mandalores, he once woke up ill-tempered and had a craving for some massive bloodshed. He sent a message to the Supreme Hive Mother Overlord of the Yuuzhan-Borg-Vongagunguna and told her she was an ugly bee-atch. The Supreme Hive Mother Overlord did not take kindly to this insult and dispatched 9 billion.76.05 troops to Mandalore's homeworld of Mandalore.

Upon their arrival Mandalore marched three hundred of his closest homies to the battlefield armed only with machette's and spears. (This was in an era before the Blaster was introduced.) Four hours later the Yuuzhan-Borg-Vongagunguna found themselves decimated and broken but the Mandalorian leader was still not satisfied; he hotwired a spaceship he stole from his enemy and took his three hundred vato's to Cube-uine, the Yuuzhan-Borg-Vongagunguna homeworld and violated their turf. Returning home a hero he choked on an apple and expired. He died again from dysentery.

Mandalore the Cynical

Mandalore the Cynical's Symbol

"Sharpen my sword and polish my armor! Valhalla here I come!"

―Mandalore the Cynical on his deathbed'

This Mandalore was known for his dark sense of humor. He chose to use a banner that would make hippies come to Mandalore only to be slaughtered. This made him extremely popular throughout the galaxy. But since this action made him so popular he never had to fight again, since one half of the Galaxy liked him so much for killing hippies and the other half was taken aback by so much cunning. He became very old. In the latter days of his life he became insane and was found randomly shouting nonsense about Norwegian mythology. After his death he was laid to rest in the Mausoleum of the Mandalores.

Mandalore the Inevitable

"Well Duh!"

―Mandalore the Inevitable

It was inevitable that he would become Mandalore. So he did.

Mandalore the Sufficient

Headshot of Mandalore the Sufficient

He was sufficient. He also led the Mandalorians in the Mandalorian Wars. He was a sufficient Mandalore right up until the end when the loss of his head in a fight with Revan made him insufficient. He ended his days as a sabaac card shark — no small feat for a man with no head.

Mandalore the Buff

Main article: Canderous Ordo

"Hmpf! Jedi Shmedi! Damn the proton torpedoes! Full speed ahead!"

―Canderous Ordo during the Mandalorian Wars

Canderous Ordo became Mandalore using the brilliant campaign called:
Canderous Ordo is your Speeder Bike.

What else can we say about good ol' Canderous that wasn't said before? He rocked. Nuff said!

Mandalore the Unintelligible

"Wees'a Maan'doo'loe'rie-ens muust'a Pieuwn what'sa eev'ar coome acc'roos our paat'ha ien oor'der to gain hoo'nour ien baatt'les"

―Mandalore the unintelligible making absolutely no sense what so ever, in a poor and failed attempt to speak Mando'a

This was a Gungan Mandalore, what in the name of Katarn, a Gungan Mandalore?!? How he ever became Mandalore is beyond me. He was given the monniker because no one understood a single word he ever spoke. Duh. He didn't have a clue about Mandalorian culture either since he removed his mask in public, an act strictly forbidden for Mandalore's. When the Mandalorians witnessed this, and what species he was, they shot him down without mercy. Phew! Good riddance!

Mandalore the Unthinkable

As no one ever thought he would become Mandalore, this is all that has been thought of.

"Hmmm... let me think now"

―Mandalore the Unthinkable

Apparently, no one would have thought that he would become mandalore. Most people just thought he was too much of a wimp to PWN in true mandalorian style. However, without giving it too much thought he one day did the unthinkable and became Mandalore, most likely ruining every betting house in the outer rim in the process. Unfortunately, he did not think that this was to be his downfall, due to the fact that he didn't think that much anyway. Now who would have thought?

Mandalore the G*nkist

"We Mandalorians will not wage war on Shabbos!!"

―Mandalore the G*nkist

Mandalore the G*nkist was a very religious Mandalore. Allways true to his men, going so far that he would carry the ashes of his most loyal subject with him where ever he went. He stated a new rule that no fighting would be done on Shabbos .....Ever! He destroyed a planet once because the inhabitants refused to Mark it zero.

Mandalore the Irredeemably, Irreversibly, Totally, Incontinently, Ridiculously, Hopelessly, Mysteriously, Honorificabilitudinitatibusly Long-Winded

"I'm speechless..."

―Mandalore the Irredeemably, Irreversibly, Totally, Incontinently, Ridiculously, Hopelessly, Mysteriously, Honorificabilitudinitatibusly Long-Winded

Very little is known about Mandalore the Irredeemably, Irreversibly, Totally, Incontinently, Ridiculously, Hopelessly, Mysteriously, Honorificabilitudinitatibusly Long-Winded, as he was known as a man of few words.

What little was known about him, however, can be expanded to fill a good deal of space. For example, as was noted above, and as is well recorded in the annals of galactic history (not to mention Mandalorian history, which, having been so inextricably interwoven in galactic events is, for all intents and purposes, basically the same thing), Mandalore the Irredeemably, Irreversibly, Totally, Incontinently, Ridiculously, Hopelessly, Mysteriously, Honorificabilitudinitatibusly Long-Winded was widely regarded as more laconic than his epithet would suggest, a discrepancy that has been thoroughly, though inconclusively, examined by any number of historians and biographers—all of whom have offered their own unique (and in most cases highly contradictory) explanations for it, including (though not limited to) the possibility that Mandalore the Irredeemably, Irreversibly, Totally, Incontinently, Ridiculously, Hopelessly, Mysteriously, Honorificabilitudinitatibusly Long-Winded grew so fatigued by introducing himself at any social gathering (of which the Mandalorians had several each year, including their Mandalorian Ice-Cream Socials, which I am told are not to be missed) that he lost the stamina to continue explaining whatever it was he had intended to say, thus creating a causality paradox that sucked in all matter and energy that was not Mandalorian in nature (and therefore awesome enough to avoid any type of destruction, no matter how narratively implausible it might seem); naturally, such an explanation does an admirable job of accounting for Mandalore the Irredeemably, Irreversibly, Totally, Incontinently, Ridiculously, Hopelessly, Mysteriously, Honorificabilitudinitatibusly Long-Winded's immense destructive power, which rivalled even that of Darth Darth Binks on one of his bad days, though, as has been argued by some (whose names escape me, but are probably too long to remember anyway), this theory fails to explain how he managed to get such an unwieldy name in the first place, though when asked, his mother (whose name was—and give me a moment to get this right—Mandalaura the Highly, Implausibly, Indescribably, Repellently, Morbidly, Glisteningly, Gravitic-Anomaly-Inducingly, Pants-Stretchingly, Gerund-Adverbizingly Obese) said, by way of explanation, and I quote, "My boy never liked the name I gave him, which was Steve."

Mandawore Da Wabbit Huntah

Mandawore Da Wabbit Huntah is shocked by the revelation that his wife is a Wabbit.

"Fow Mandawowe wid my speaw and magic helmuwt!"

―Mandawore Da Wabbit Huntah's battlecry

"Kill Da Wabbit! Kill Da Wabbit! Kill Da Wabbit!"

―The most played song on his iPod

Mandawore Da Wabbit Huntah was a Mandalore who suffered from a morbid fear of Wabbits. He was so terrified of wabbits that he had a special spear and magic helmet made for himself so that he could hunt them down. He even destroyed planets in order to be sure he had wiped them out (he couldn't sleep unless he knew for sure). But he hurled himself off a cliff in horror once his queen revealed herself to be of Wabbit kind.

Mandalore the Way-too-Awesome-for-any-words-except-the-words-that-are-being-put-down-now-for-no reason-at-all-and-why-the-hell-am-I-still-writing-because-this-is-getting-kinda-pointless

Mandalorian: "What shall you have me do, oh mighty Mandalore?"

Boba Fett: "Hmmmm, since the vong are all defeated, its been pretty boring... I don't know, Yoda looked at me funny that one time, lets go Blow up Frogger, GET MY SHIP GOD DAMNIT!!!"

— Boba to an underling

Boba Fett decided that he wanted to be Mandalore, so he became Mandalore. As Mandalore, he kicked major Yuuzhan Vong @$$, PWNED Fandalorians and just generally blew shit up. Then he got bored and quit, after which he joined Fordo's empire, I pwn everything as Fordo's butt buddy lover main enforcer. Then he helped Fordo overthrow Kyle Katarn as god and became his submissive bitch throne.

Mandalore the Blue

Mandalore the Blue drunk way to much Blue Milk when he was young, making his skin color turn to a pale blue, which was a common side effect of drinking Blue Milk. He experienced some hallucinations throughout his life due to his early exposure to Blue Milk, these hallucinations caused him to paint his armor blue and gave him the title of Mandalore the Blue.

Mandalore the Feathered

Being that cool is easy for a cockatoo.

"Get the fuck outta my ship, Vader. Or I'll punish you horribly."

―Mandalore the Feathered threatening Darth Vader.

Mandalore the Feathered had feathers because he was a cockatoo. He didn't like to wear gloves and he cut the tops off of all his helmets so he could show off his gorgeous cockatoo head-feathers. This was a smart move because said feathers attracted hot chicks. And not just bird chicks, Twi'lek and humans too. He liked to threaten people.

Unconfirmed Mandalores

Simon the Killer Ewok

Main article: Simon the Killer Ewok

"Yu'b Yu'b!!"

―Simon

Was he a Mandalore? He could be, he just could.

Appearances

• Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
• Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic: The Forgotten Sagas
• Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic: The Sith Lords
• Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic: Ways to Die
• Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic: The Sith Lords Return