IG-88
| |
| IG-88 | |
|---|---|
| Production information | |
| Manufacturer | |
| Product line |
IG line |
| Model |
IG-88 |
| Class |
A, B, C, D |
| Technical specifications | |
| Height |
Roughly 2 meters |
| Sensor color |
Red |
| Armament |
|
| Equipment |
|
| Chronological and political information | |
| Era(s) |
The Rebellion Era |
- "Dunununununnunuh EIGHTY EIGHT!! Wait...."
- ―Sadly mistaken Batman enthusiast on IG-88
Made by some weird Halloween droid company or something, IG-88 was definitely most kick-ass droid in that whole group of bounty hunters seen in the Star Wars movies. Sure, he had 4-LOM to compete with, but he was just a protocol droid gone bad. Seriously, you can't get any more gay than the protocol droids.
Armed with a cool, gun-looking thingy, a mind set of conquering the universe programmed in him, and a modified Trilon Aggressor assault fighter, IG-88 was one droid better left un-messed with.
The IG-88 Family
- "It's like a damn multiple choice test."
- ―A grudging scholar on the IG-88 droids
Contrary to popular belief, there are more than one IG-88 droid. I bet you're thinking something along the lines of "That can't be! With that much coolness and kick-ass...ness the galaxy would have imploded!". Well, I once thought the same thing, but then I discovered that the galaxy from Star Wars has an abnormally high capacity for those sort of things. I mean, just look at all of the coolness and kick-assness: Bossk, Lando Calrissian, Mace Windu, and Nien "Nonk" Nunb. Just when you thought the galaxy couldn't hold the coolness of IG-88, these people came crashing in and it still held. The galaxy deserves a big giant pastrami sandwich for that one.
Anyway, back to the point, their are actually four of these droids; but the only IG-88 droid you ever see is IG-88 B, better known as "Butthead" to competition in the bounty hunting business. Why? Because he was just so good at killing people other people didn't stand a chance against him, so they called him bad names, even worse than butthead. Some other common nicknames for this badass robot include:
- (IG) 88 kills
- IG-88 backstabber
- IG-88 better-than-you
The other robots are IG-88 A, C, and D. They do the same stuff as B, but nobody really cares about them because they aren't in any movies. However, they are all just as kick ass.
A Diabolical (and soon Dead) Droid Family
These droids were killers from the start. Seriously, I wouldn't mess with these guys, because from the moment they were created they killed the scientists who made them and ran away. And I didn't even mention the horrible things they did to the dead bodies.
Then, after that, these loons decided to start the droid revolution. They raided droid factories, and made all of the droids like the ones depicted in old 50's movies that say "I will destroy you!" because, in reality, they were supposed to. However, Boba Fett, the real Star Wars bounty hunting badass, killed off droids B and C, and D was killed by some asshole.
A was the last IG-88 droid left, and, in his utter coolness, uploaded his mental-brain-computer shit into the second Death Star, so he literally became the Death Star. He would have got away with it too, if it wasn't for those meddling kids and their stupid dog that foiled his plans by blowing destroying the Death Star, and, technically IG-88 A. A real sob story, I know.
In other words, these once badass and dangerous droids were totally PWNED within a matter of seconds. It's sort of surprising, considering their ability to calculate the path of a falling rock takes less than like a millionth of a second or something like that and their cool guns and just all around kick-ass...ness?
Anyway, as they say, all good things must come to an end, and the IG-88 droids ended as well (In case you didn't notice, they weren't good guys. I was just talking about this article and how good it is.)
