Darth Moron
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| Darth Moron | |
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| Biographical information | |
| Homeworld | |
| Died |
Yes |
| Physical description | |
| Species | |
| Gender | |
| Hair color |
Lots |
| Chronological and political information | |
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Darth Moron was an extremely thin and stupid Sith Wookiee from around the time of the Great Sith War. He was one of Exar Kun's apprentices. When Exar Kun met Darth Moron (at this point in time his name was Bob Ugnugg as he had not quite attained "Darth" status) Exar sensed that Moron had enormous potential to be a Sith. Exar brought Moron back to his headquarters and tested him for mental, physical, and Force related potential. The test showed high potential in Force areas but no potential in physical or mental areas.
Darth Moron had, to go with his thin frame almost zero muscle mass. This resulted in him experiencing great difficulty in lifting things that he considered heavy such as lightsabers and TV remotes. Thus Exar Kun purchased a virtual reality lightsaber training system from a place called Cheap Virtual Reality Programs Online. Once delivered, Darth Moron trained with it for hours on end (this system was the basis for Nintendo's Wii console).
Progress
Soon he was given a Darth name and a red lightsaber by Kun and made into a full-fledged Sith but upon receiving he attempted to activate the lightsaber but neglected to check which end the blade came out of and ended up cutting off his right hand. His name was Darth Mooronn. Soon Kun began to send Mooronn on missions throughout the galaxy secretly to advance the war effort against the Jedi. He succeeded in only one mission out of the four missions he was sent on but Kun was far too busy to notice at the time. Soon, Kun began to run low on Sith but received the perfect opportunity to wipe out the Jedi: the Jedi High Council and fifty other knights and Padawans were to attend a no-weapons summit meeting on the planet Ossus with delegates from all the planets allied to the Jedi cause. He was given a huge battle cruiser called "Bob" with 10 full legions of troops to ambush the delegates and Jedi at the summit. Unfortunately, just after leaving for Ossus, Mooronn accidentally set the self-destruct timer and when he realized what he had done he snuck into the only escape pod on the ship and fled back to Kun. This loss put such a blow into Kun's armies that he could no longer win the war.
Kun found out what had happened and officially had Darth Mooronn's Darth name changed from "Mooronn" to "Moron".
In captivity
Soon after this, Exar Kun was defeated and the Great Sith War was ended. Darth Moron was found by the Jedi in Exar Kun's headquarters. He was sitting in a corner, crying and sucking his thumb. He was brought back to the Jedi Council for questioning. The Council asked him many questions but his answer to all of them was: "I can't answer that." The Jedi misinterpreted this as sheer stubbornness but really he was so stupid that he didn't know the answers. The Jedi then attempted to reform Darth Moron to the light side but realized it was pointless and decided to let him go. They gave him 1,000,000 credits and they told him to buy a life but he misunderstood and when he reached Coruscant where the Jedi sent him, he spent it all buying box after box after box of "Life" cereal. He ate this for awhile but it soon ran out and he became a hobo.
Somehow, he managed to transport himself into the future. There he encountered Darth Plagueis, who was searching for an apprentice. Darth Moron trained with Plagueis until Plagueis found Palpatine. Palpatine realized that there was only room for one apprentice and challenged Moron to a battle to the death. In the following duel (which lasted less than ten seconds) Moron was killed. Plagueis then sapped up all of Moron's dark side energies which greatly increased his power. This resulted in Plagueis becoming quite possibly the most powerful Sith yet. He then wiped Palpatine's memory of the duel and the final resting place of Darth Moron's energies. Thus, Palpatine never could find out how Plagueis had influence over life and death.
