Zuckuss

From Darthipedia, the Star Wars Humor Wiki, currently editing over 582,970,995 articles
Jump to: navigation, search
ZuckussPhone.JPG
Zuckuss
Biographical information
Homeworld

Gand

Died

-15 ABY,csilla command ship

Physical description
Species

Gand

Gender

Male

Height

1.5 m

Eye color

Silver

Chronological and political information
Affiliation

Bounty Hunters Guild

"What's this? I found a quarter!"
―Zuckuss, demonstrating his talents

Zuckuss was a Gand bounty hunter with somewhat low self esteem who worked for the Galactic Empire and the Rebel Alliance. He hated when people called him "Zuckass," which happened a lot. At some point in his life, he suffered lung damage from exposure to the Pissed Mist.

He had a knack for finding things, like TV remotes fallen behind the couch or obscure provisions in a mortgage contract. Naturally, he believed this gift would translate well in the bounty hunting trade. He was only half-right. Zuckuss became a Gand findsman, working his way up in the organization by finding his keys, missing socks, and board game pieces. Unfortunately, he soon discovered he had no talent for finding moving targets. Frustrated and seized with crippling self-doubt, he sought out a fellow bounty hunter, the droid 4-LOM.

Zuckuss and 4-LOM began a long and profitable career when they met in a small club in Hamburg on Tatooine. They began writing songs together soon afterward. The duo became a big hit in the Outer Rim, attracting the attention of local music agents, who Zuckuss and 4-LOM readily turned into Imperial authorities for thousands of credits. The two bounty hunters found their stylistic differences complemented each other perfectly: Zuckuss was the happy, bubbly personality with a talent for catchy melodies, while 4-LOM was a serious, sarcastic soul with political aspirations.

Interestingly enough, Zuckuss had multiple personality disorder, and his other personality, "Mr. Zuck," was a much better bounty hunter than he was. Under that personality, Zuckuss purchased the Mist Hunter. The ship was sold at a bargain price as the seller knew of Zuckuss's mental instability and was therefore not concerned if the Gand ever discovered that the ship was actually a TARDIS.Zuckass was recruited by Thrawn 2 to lead his army. This was a bad idea as Elmo.jr arrived in the command room, and killed zuckass with a knife.

WookieepediaLogoBouncing-Thumb.gif
Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Zuckuss.