From Darthipedia, the Star Wars Humor Wiki, currently editing over 582,970,995 articles
- Separatist Crisis Escalates to War? Rumors abound about the strange white-armored soldiers seen on Coruscant.
- Elderly woman destroys famous fresco of Gonk; botched restoration project (pictured) angers the Church of G*nk.
- Victory and Murder on Coruscant! Planet avoids destruction, but many Pavan's die in the aftermath. Oh, and Count Dooku kicks the bucket in this tell-all expose by our reporter in the front lines, Arsonius T. Xenophasis!
- Victory on Christophsis! The Republic is victorious over Separatists despite Jedi being on our side.
- Traitor on Christophsis! A traitor has been revealed on Christophsis, who is it?
- News From Christophsis! Jedi and Republic forces have engaged Separatists on Christophsis.
- War Confirmed! The Galactic Republic hasn't had a war in a thousand years. It's about damn time.
- Adalric Cessius Brandl the biological father of Imperial secretary!; bastard child (pictured with father) causes scandal.
- Darthipedia's sister-site Wookieepedia celebrates fifth anniversary; people expected to actually care.
- Lance Ithor gives up! Lance Ithor gives up as thieves constantly steal his name placard
- Disney buys rights to Star Wars; Darthipedia characters celebrate their new canonical status.
- G*nk is sighted at K-Mart buying toilet paper with Elvis and JFK!
- Nadyax Pavanman has her 582,797,754th child.
- Emperor Palpatine apologizes profusely to Nuknog radio host Slybaugh Limrush after claiming that "nobody knows more about being a Sith than me, including that Limrush guy."
- The ongoing galactic financial crisis inspires Mace Windu to suicide by leaping from an open window on Coruscant.
- Perennial third-party candidate Jax Pavan received 582,797,753 electoral votes in this year's Coruscant gubernatorial election, resulting in his unexpected defeat by Jax Pavan.
- The starship Malevolence is renamed Happy Freedom Sunshine Ship after testing badly among Separatist focus groups.
- Darthipedia's regular users Bombed the G*nk out of 500 random planets this day to celebrate their birthday.
- JediGear Inc.-brand Action Backpacks manufactured on Druckenwell have been recalled due to their inability to withstand the weight of huttlets.
- Apparently some dumbass gave Anakin Skywalker a padawan, named No Soup-a With-a Buffet. She evidently was not important enough to merit mention in Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, but you're going to buy her merchandise anyway, according to Lucasfilm representatives.
- Yahoo have launched a
blatant copy of Wookieepediawiki-esque Star Wars website, complete with highly informative forums and links to the ever law-abiding YouTube.
- Anthony Daniels has been officially cast as C-3PO, R2-D2, HK-999, and Anakin Skywalker in the upcoming Star Wars animated TV series.
- The Energizer Bunny, the one-time rival of Darth Vader, was arrested in his home; he is charged with battery.
- The Original Trilogy has been deemed non-canon.
- At Celebration Europe, someone said that Lucasfilm hopes to produce as many as 4 episodes of the Star Wars live-action TV series.