TIE crawler

From Darthipedia, the Star Wars Humor Wiki, currently editing over 582,970,995 articles
Jump to: navigation, search
TIE crawler
"You know what we need? A TIE fighter with tank-treads."
"Oh, good grief."
"We'll call it... the TIE crawler."
"Let's call it the Century Tank."
"Ooh, I like that. Why Century Tank?"
"Because it's the dumbest idea in a century.
―Santhe Corporation industrialists

TIE crawlers, or Century tanks, were TIE fighter cockpits mounted between two tank-treads. They retained the features of a TIE fighter: no shielding, light armor, filled with weak points in structural integrity; in addition, they removed the one strategic advantage of TIE fighters, i.e., their maneuverability. At least they stuck a big turbolaser on it, so they could blow things up... if they survived. TIE crawlers made for great target practice. On rough terrain, the weak point between the cockpit and tread sometimes snapped, leaving the crawler helpless. Sometimes they went haywire and began somersaulting.

Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Century tank.

The Galactic Empire didn't use them much, but after the Rebel Alliance won the Galactic Civil War, a bunch of TIE crawlers were sold at clearance prices to the Imperial Remnant.