Spontaneous dental hydroplosion

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A spontaneous dental hydroplosion sufferer in what appears to be his terminal stages.

Spontaneous dental hydroplosion is a terrible disease affecting approximately one in every thousand house/hut-holds in the Kingdom of Tonga.

Symptoms

  1. Teeth feel watery.
  2. Teeth turn to liquid.
  3. Teeth drip down the back of throat.
  4. Teeth re-solidify in stomach.
  5. Teeth bite a hole in stomach.
  6. Death.

How to spread this disease

Currently, the only way this disease can spread is through coming in sexual contact with a person carrying hotdog fingers. While tempting as it may sound, we strongly suggest avoiding sex with a hotdog fingers carrier. Your life may depend on it.

Cure

NONE!

...

For now...

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Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Suicide teeth.