Riff Tamson

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Riff Tamson
Biographical information
Homeworld

Karkurkurddle... kar

Died

21 BBY, Dac

Physical description
Species

Kurkamurkle, Karkadarka, feh

Gender

Male

Height

2.21 m

Eye color

Black like a doll's eyes

Chronological and political information
Era(s)

Rise of the Empire era

Affiliation

Confederacy of Independent Systems

"Barracuda!"
"Huh? What?"
"Oh, I mean, uh,
shark!"
"Shark! Aaaaagh!
"
―Somebody warning somebody else about Riff Tamson

Riff Tamson was a Kurka... Kurkadurka... Krinklekronkle... Shark Man who served as a military leader for the Confederacy of Independent Systems. They sent him to all the water-worlds because the Trade Federation was too cheap to give scuba gear to all their guys.

Riff led the attack on Dac, which for some reason people were calling "Mon Cala" at the time, because they were dumbasses. He was defeated by Anakin Skywalker, Captain Ackbar, a bunch of fish people and Gungans. He got blown up by a pacifist, but he refused to "smile" first. Oh, and sometime before his death, he became a cofounder of Wookiepedia.

He once chased an entire family to the Bahamas and could swim faster than a passenger jet.

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Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Riff Tamson.