Matthew Stover

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Pictured: a multitalented individual with stellar novel-writing credentials (right), seated next to smug, self-satisfied author Matthew Stover (left)

Matthew Stover is the author of the Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith novelization, as well as Traitor and Shatterpoint. Though his vocabulary may be limited at times, he makes up for it, makes up for it, via repetition and italics. He first met italics in his junior year of college. The two fell in love and were married in 1982. Matthew and italics have three children and a dog. A dog! His name is Aias.

His middle name is Woodring. You can tell his age by slicing him open and counting the Woodrings.

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Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Matthew Stover.