Jawa juice

From Darthipedia, the Star Wars Humor Wiki, currently editing over 582,970,995 articles
(Redirected from Jawa Juice)
Jump to: navigation, search
The "unfortunate" accident

Jawa juice was a popular juice made that sold over 3 trillion packs, along with blue milk, which was also made from Jawas. Jawa juice is made from a live Jawa that is ground up and turned into a liquid substance. Jawa juice costs about 3 dollars a can, so they are expensive, and delicious.


During one of his many journeys through Tatooine's deserts in his Sandcrawler, one of Darth Jawa's many Jawa minions "accidentally" fell into the grinder and was turned into Jawa juice. Darth Jawa took a gulp, and loved it. He then started selling it at Tatooine's space ports and the new drink became a hit. The drink made him very rich, but eventually he ran out off minions, so he had to find new minions, but he had already turned more than 90% of all Jawas into Jawa juice and the remaining Jawas did not trust him. One day he had a brilliant idea, he cloned himself and had his clones put his other clones in the grinder and sell the Jawa juice. Now that his clones were doing all the work for him, he could once again focus on finding ways to destroy planets. It is unknown if he ever succeeded in destroying a planet.

Really Good Jawa juice

When Darth Nerd traveled to Tatooine, Darth Jawa was still angry about the Happy Pony Lovers incident, so Darth Jawa captured him and tortured him for a few days. When torturing him became boring, Darth Jawa tried to juice him. But, unfortunately, Darth Nerd escaped because one of Darth Jawa's minions forgot to turn on the juicer. Darth Jawa punished the stupid minion by torturing him for a few days and then juiced him. When he consumed the minions juicy remains he discovered that torturing a Jawa before juicing him produced really good Jawa juice.

Other types of Jawa juice