Cakhmaim

From Darthipedia, the Star Wars Humor Wiki, currently editing over 582,970,995 articles
Jump to: navigation, search
Cakhmaim, after laying waste to the junk of a would-be attacker

Cakhmaim was a Noghri warrior indebted to Leia Organa Solo as a matter of honor. He served as her personal bodyguard.

His name was deliberately misspelled by C-3PO to avoid using his real and less polite name of "Cockmaim." Like most of his clan, the Mutilators of the Pork Dagger, Cakhmaim took great glee in savagely destroying the genitalia of his enemies. Throughout his service to the Solo family, he had the good fortune to bloody the crotch areas of Imperial assassins, insurrectionists, rogue droids, Dark Jedi Adepts, Yuuzhan Vong soldiers, and innocent bystanders who happened to look at him the wrong way.
Ironically, Cakhmaim fell victim to a thud bug during the Yuuzhan Vong War.

Other famous members of Cakhmaim's clan included Chubcrush, Wangslash, Rodwreck, Dickwallop, Dinglebatter, Dongsmash, Toolcrunch, Schlonghack, Prickshatter, Membermash, Woodclobber, Peterbruise, Willywound, and the clan patriarch, Penismangle.

Appearances

  • Groin and Grandiosity: The Noghri's Tale
WookieepediaLogoBouncing-Thumb.gif
Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Cakhmaim.